Follow your heart

I just finished 2/3 of my papers. My next and last paper for this semester is on Friday so I thought I should let myself take a short break tonight and then get back to studying tomorrow morning! Certain things have happened... well, not so recently but still, it has been bothering me. I almost drifted into thinking about it yesterday when I was supposed to be studying for today's paper. Dear gave me a kind of nudge to tell me to stop. I decided to put it behind me and only think about it after I'm done with my last paper. However, today it dawned upon me that I wouldn't want to think about depressing stuff after exams when I'm actually supposed to be enjoying myself and getting my deserved rest in preparation for next semester.

Hence, I am here. I won't go into detail about what had happened but certain things I've done have made me scared of myself. No, I'm not a schizophrenic. It is just that I feel that I'm changing in this environment and the things I've done/been doing isn't healthy or helpful to me at all. One of the things that I'm bothered about has also been confusing me. When I think I should be doing the right thing and do it, I realise that the right thing may not be always appropriate. So I end up questioning myself, is the right thing wrong now? That has been the basis of my recent dilemmas. Maybe I have trust issues... with myself? Hahaha. I hope I don't sound like I'm depressed. I spoke to dear a couple of times about this too. I think he trusts me more than I trust myself sometimes. So I'm going to be who I am and follow my heart. One important thing I've learnt after making all these mistakes is to always think before doing. I keep getting lost in my thoughts when I'm handling stuff like these and when emotions take over, the composure is definitely gone and I can't think clearly. I pray for some faith in myself to do things right.

Okay! So now that I've poured my thoughts out into words, it's time to add some colour to this post. What can be better than pictures?! :D (and delightfully grabbed from tumblr too. Tumblr is awesome! :D )

This is making me so hungry now.

Dear always calls me little ball of fur. Hahaha.

Good night.